[Snowy Breeze] III : Evil Spell

TG : re (c) Ishida Sui

Despite the fact that some strange things did happen, C.S Lewis' unique fantasy story was not be able to cooling my saturated point of emotion. This agitated feeling sure left nothing except a distracted and confusion questions. I'd been thinking for almost half of my day and none seemed so real. Yet, by the end of work clock, Mutsuki Tooru did realize something weird on my face. He knew it so well and sometimes it made me jittering. Whatever kinds of smile I gave to him, he just found it all lies. The way he showed me his knitted eyebrows were only a defensive response. I knew he never meant to drag me out like Shirazu or Akira. I stepped forward and didn't look back to him. I mean, literally. So, I decided to wash my hair and hoping the cold shower could ease my shitty thoughts.

Shiro had eaten quarter of his milk that I'd poured on his cute baby cup before I finished bathing. This fatty cat might develop serious illness once he could not change his daily meal habit. It was definitely my fault, yes. My bathrobe felt so fluffy but I pick my old t-shirt and mix-match it with this uncool boxer which Shirazu gave me as my birthday commemoration. That's weird. Everything beyond my vision was hazy enough to make me sleeping without taking pills again. Insomniac was not big deal for me, but the main problem more or less always concentrate on one thing.


The ceiling showed me an unfamiliar scene. Two different people stand right side by side. One of them was quiet shorter than the other but he had the same color hair with the taller one. White. Snow white. Pure white. The wind breeze between their silhouettes. Few petals of red flower fell off and I still remembered the bus stop was taking too long time to come. I dropped my phone and I saw something unexpected. A boy with black gakuran, a very deep piercing eyes, two sharp cat-eye pupils, icy cold expression, but the warmth from his breath clouded with tiny little sparkling ball on his tongue melted into one enigma. Or, an adult man with a humble nature whom I admired so long.

None of those scenes were ever real. None

"Miaw."

At least, I was not the only one who lived inside this small flat.

I took him on my lap and scratching his fluffy fat jaw. I tried to open C.S Lewis' book for the second time and wondering why all of the characters with stupid white hair were blessed with so much evil power.

Such as... Queen Jadis.

She was sure a sadist.

Aha! I made a pun!

My blurry and hazy eyes became the lullaby of the night. The sleeping pills were left behind. And, Shiro's miaw fetched me into a deep slumber.

----

It's very cold. The ice blocks.

I've been surrounded by blocks of ice cubes.

It freeze me.

When I opened my eyes, the only thing my eyes could catch was a dark ocean.

Deep. So deep. And so freezing.

Like I'd been frozen for eternity.

No sounds I was able to hear. Nor listen. Only a sight of black shadow above me.

Minute by minute, my legs as hard as stone. My beating heart stopped. No blood rushing to my vein.

And the shadow appeared this close. So close. Close.

I saw his face.

He had that evil smile. Whispering to my lips. Touching my cheeks gently.

'Have some sleep and die forever, Haise.'

He... wanted me to... die?

'...into a deep blue sea.'

And, everything became so blurry. I just wanted to sleep more.

'DIE!'

I breathed harsh. The ceiling illuminated the dark night sky. It's okay. I was still in here. Inside my tiny flat. I woke up with so much sweats. My lungs lack of oxygen. I raised my head little bit and Shiro still slept on my lap. Purring softly.

Well, I did have a nightmare. A worse nightmare ever.

----

"Sooo, will ya tell me where did you go last night, Kukicchi?"

"What the hell are you talking about, you dimwit."

"Nah! Do not be shy upon me, Lord Hypocrite. And, do not hide lies to me. I've seen ya hanging around together with a veeeeery pretty girl at Shinbashi road. It's almost ten, by the way. Nobody ever wants to going out too late in the night for a pan of pizza actually. Except me, of course."

The tension was getting worse. Kuki stopped biting his own hamburger and freezing. What a interesting view.

"You're so gross, Shirazu. Do you have some weird fetishes by stalking people everywhere they go around?"

Today was a week long after my last meeting with a snow white hair boy in black gakuran at the bus stop. I hadn't met him ever since that. Maybe he found me disgusting and scared if I showed up in there again.

I was wondering of how this conversation originally started from. The four of us, minus Saiko-chan, finally had a more friendlier talks rather than a judging table court over days. It felt more natural for me now and I liked it. I eat my veggies hamburger while staring nonchalantly at these dorks. They were arguing about silly stuffs all day long, not exception for our lunch break. The cafetaria which has just been opened the previous day were selected by Mutsuki himself. He tried to speak up his idea when Shirazu and Kuki lost from the online chess game. Well, the shark teeth boy must had known who was better at this point. He might be little bit abnormal and not using his brain enough, but I knew he had plan for Tooru. So, I smiled freely toward this sweet bean hair boy and giving my best shoot to him, no more fake smiles. The good happened next, he smiled genuinely to me. It was so relieving.

Yet, they still kept shouting and made buzz noises. A similarity of cat and dog street fight. I sighed and sucking my Moo Moo milk calmly. I was almost done with my lunch and guess, I'd better get going as soon as possible. Who knew if a client call me up.

Right before I moved my empty box of milk, Tooru stared me with an apology expression. I sit back and waiting for him to talk.

"What's up?" I opened the conversation first. Leading him to speak. No pressure over taken.

"I am sorry, Haise-san. It seemed--well--I've made you falling into trouble thoughts. I mean, yesterday was okay. I know you must have something on your mind and it looked so complicated for you. So, really. I am sorry if I made you worrying about the coffee that you slipped. I was not mad at you. I was just feeling like... like... If there is something I am able to do, you can always talk to me. Although, I am not quiet sure if I could help much. Sorry."

At the beginning, there would be always a weakened one who could not even speak his own name. He had a small petite body with an white eyepatch that close one of his eye from seeing the world dualism. The frightened voice and it sounded more like a mice squeaking. His hands trembled a lot but the fingers he had made fast movement whenever he typed something on the keyboard. He might have the character in which people around him would forget so easily. The minor one. Foreshadowed by another biggest one and smarter one and strong one. The world he owned was the place beyond the universe, just like a palace with millions cheese. He knew it's good to become like this forever since the lighter the place he was in, the easier he got fallen. He loved acting as a cameo but I knew one day, there would be a day he showed his true self. Much brighter than anybody elses.

I've seen it through Mutsuki Tooru's eyes. His eyes spoke much more rather than his lips.

The each side of my lips pursed a sudden wave of happiness. By looking the way he smiled back at me, no more should be worrying about. I was okay.

Ah, and I forgot something.

"Eh?"

"It's nothing compared to your knit sweater that you wore last day. But, I saw this one from my way back to home. The owner of this house garment is my father's good friend. So, I think I could wrap it for you as an apology sign. The one who needs to say sorry thousands time is me, Tooru. I am sorry and thank you for your offering. It's good to see that you have a caring friend among this so-called busy company. And, I would love also hear and listening to your trouble even I may not help too much."

"A-ah. Y-yes, sure. B-b-but, I think you do not have to do this. I-I mean, I--mm--appreciate your giving b-but I think--"

I patted his shoulder. Smiling.

"It's okay, Tooru. Besides, I couldn't give you anything for thanksgiving present last year. Just stick with it, 'kay? Haha."

"U-umm. T-thank you. Thank you so much, Haise-san."

"Doumo."

He laughed. It was the first time I saw Mutsuki Tooru laughed so carefree. I felt so content. No doubts.

But, the strange stares and gazes lurking me backward. Shirazu twitched his lip. What a baby.

"Weeeeell, did we miss something on here?"

"A-aah! It-It's nothing! Really!" said Tooru while hugging my present to him. Kuki's eyes rolled and I found him having no more interest with this lunch break time. Our stupid lunch break time.

The lord of hypocrite stand up and went away. Shirazu followed him like a baby duck. They were cute, in different matters. Here I was. Together with Tooru. He looked not so comfortable now and the flushes on his cheeks nearly pushed me over the edge of insanity. It was not something special or a love started to bloom between us. Heck, why was I thinking about that now. He was my co-worker and I respected him and vice versa. No, it's too different. There would be no romance in this short story. Because, I knew how my story would finally end.

This cafetaria were full of workers like me or Tooru. Wearing suits or semi formal shirts and having some discussion about works, works, and works. My twenty six years of life only infatuated with jobs and its stuffs. Really, I was a boring dude. A terrible boring gay dude. All I had to do was staring blankly at the one spot that seemed so... close. Yet, far enough to reach.

"Haise-san? Should we come back now? Shirazu and Kuki-sa--Ha-Haise-san?"

Some odd magic spell forced me to move my legs automatically. Like a doll with no will. I was starting to form some delusional views. About a very sadist and creepy ice queen with icy cold smiles and gestures. My fingers trembled and my heart throbbing so damn crazy. I had that dream again. About two men which one of them was pushing me into a deep blue see. Drowning me with his wicked smirks.

I...

I...

I...

...who are you?

"Hi."

I said it.

The boy in black gakuran. He was here. Sitting so lonely though he has three companions over his table. Holding his chin lazily. Staring me with an opal pierced eyes. Long eyelashes and beautiful nose. Pale skin and on contrary fixated with the sunny heat that reflected by the window glass. The snow white of hair which he let it loosely. The small cheek bone. The black dyed nail. The... same pursed smile.

On the bus stop.

"Ha-Haise-san? What--"

My throat became so dry. I lost my own tongue. No words spilled over.

The Cruciatus spell killed me. No. The evil must locked my head with his poison.

"Do I know you, Mr... Sexy in Black Suit?"

W-what?

What just did he call me?

Err...

"Woah, woah. Wait a minute. Wait a minute by any seconds of my life. Dammit, Kaneki. I know you love to spread your seducing pheromone everywhere you go. But, really. This old hunk is not your type. I bet it. And, now. Do you know each other? How do you know each other. And, where did you meet for the first time? How did you meet? Did you guys have done--hmmmmph!"

"Stop talking nonsense, Hide. Your shitty mouth makes this uncle trembling so terrible. Look."

And now the little lady with black hair had called me 'uncle'. What a nice manner of speak. But, I must thank to whatever she'd done to shout his noisy blonde friend. He talked too much and I even did not what to say anymore. I did lose my words. Oddly, I was still staring without blinking right at that snow white hair boy. He might broke my healthy brain by the seconds he spilled the creamy jar at one of his black nailed finger and sucking it with lusty sound. Did  he try to embarrass me with that kind of act? Or was is just me who merely started to think poisonous imagination. Oh dear.

I barely could see that tiny silver ball that pierced right through on his tongue. A very sinful view.

"And now you make everything much worsen, stupid Kaneki. That guy over there may get an erection from your sinful tongue."

W-what?

"Listen, Ayato. I never intend to lure this guy whom I never meet or see before into this wrecking point of view. I mean, jeez, I love an older guy with tight black outfit but I am not some kind of shitty bitch who loves to showing off their pussies anywhere."

The profanity that came out directly from his moist lips broke my freezing mode. It sounded so wrong yet ironic. So, I stand still. Like a real strange dude with a strange behaviour. Smiling or rather smirking sadly.

"...besides, it's all I had since the first time I was born."

"Yeah. A gift to lure guys to fuck you up."

My eyebrows twitched. This boy had a shameful mouth. Not educated enough.

"You damn Aya--"

"I-I am very sorry for breaking your conversation but I may need to clarify something."

Mutsuki Tooru still stand behind my back. He looked so confused and I should clear this stupid action of mine to him before everything went crazy. Anyway, there was still a little work to do with a boy whose name I knew must be Ayato or what. The brat who loved using a very terrible manners of speaking. I should teach them.

"Mm, well, you may forget this but we've met once. Couple days ago at the bus stop. Strangely, I just bumped you and dropping my phone but you were not like other high schooler looked might be. You gave me my dropped phone and speaking so nice. For me, that's very rare to find it among rebellious teenager like you all. I mean, that's what I saw from you. But anyway, still, I haven't said my thanks properly to you and it seemed God has reunited us in here accidentally. Don't you think so?"

Long silence. Single pause.

"And, you. Little dude out there. You have a very bad manner of speaking. Did your mother teach you how to use a proper language especially when you talked to your friends? If I were your companion, I might have slapped your face twice."

There was still long pause. I did not like it.

And, a single laugh burst out.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Yes, I know I have such terrible manner of speaking. Well, I know that. But, who's gonna teach me anyway? My Mum is already dead when I was just starting to crawl, you dumbass. And my Dad has gone and only God knows where he goes. And my silly twin is so damn annoy--"

I think I heard a sound of punch and cracked bone.

"That's hurts, Touka! What the hell was that punch for?!"

"I'm here to represent my stupid moron brother who knows nothing but having fun only. If the way his speaking is troubling you, then I am sorry, Sir. But, none single of us here knows you. You are just a strange old guy who we may think a crazy stalker or what. So please, even though Kaneki's sexual pheromones excite you so bad, just waited until we disappear. We are just a bunch of problematic high schooler who loves hanging around outside in the middle of school lunch break. But, trust me, we are not a crime. But, this blonde boy of mine might have steal something from a convenience store."

"He-hey, why do you have to spit it over? I'm not a thief, you know. I'm just... just..."

"Hahaha."

Did I laugh?

'Cause everybody stopped talking so sudden.

Then, there were three faces with knitted eyebrows staring straight back at me. My mouth just said funny things and I did not realize it well until the main subject of my interest that noon smirked and showing me his perfect shape of canines. His shabby half lidded eyes put me in dangerous situation and I just found that I had been trapped by millions spider webs inside his evil cage. But, no matter how hard I tried to go away, even by Tooru's trembling fingers on my sleeve, I was still on there. Waiting like a puppy. And the next thing I knew was the clearer sky of spring breeze. Beyonda colorful place at somewhere far enough from Kishou's Corp building. Too far away and the mistakes I made was leaving Tooru with his worrying face. He hugged my present into his chest so tight.

The evil poisonous spell came out. The power struck me so hard. And nobody could ever be freed from it.

...

'How about you pay your thanks by treating me a big cup of Baskin Robbins' ice cream, huh?'

Well, I loved ice cream too.

[to be continued]